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Showing posts from June, 2009

Actions - Reactions 9

Q) I love my wife even at old age. A) You must be archaeologist. Q) My girlfriend is devil ? A) I see redundancy in your statement. Q) I got a new car for my wife. A) That's great exchange offer Q) Have you taken IQ test ? A) Yes, I took one, but results were in negative. Q) Have an open mind ? A) I am afraid my brain will fall out. Q) I am bad at memory A) You should not worry as long as you are telling truth. Q) Why cant you do multitasking ? A) I screw one thing at a time. Q) What do you think of your girl friend ? A) She is alive, because it is illegal to shoot people. Q) Tell me about women ? A) There are several theories, but my experience is none of them work. Q) My girlfriend don't want to marry me and don't want to leave me as well ? A) As long as you are optimist, she will be opportunist.

Actions - Reactions 8

Q) Why you write this series Actions-Reactions. A) Because for every Action there is an equal and opposite Reaction. Q) what does this give ? A) A short sentence based on my long experience. Q) You need little improvement. A) May be my gene pool need chlorine wash. Q) you want to slip into something comfortable ? A) I don't want to go to coma now. Q) What are rules and exceptions ? A) Rules are for others and exceptions are for ourselves. Q) What is fine and what is tax ? A) A fine is a tax for doing wrong. A tax is a fine for doing well. Q) Life is like a bird ? A) Yep, Its cute, until it shits on your head. Q) Are you unique ? A) Yes, I am Unique, just like everyone else. Q) I am working restless yet no satisfaction in life ? A) Ah ....you must be a software engineer.

Actions - Reactions 7

Q) I am bored with my 40 year old wife . A) You cant trade her for two twenty year old girls. So live with it. Q) Hardwork has future payoff A) Lazyness pays of NOW !!! Q) Do you think god loves me ? A) Yes he does, that's why he mad so many stupid people like you in this world. Q) Do you achieve your target always ? a) Yes, its pretty simple. Do what you want to do, whatever result you get, call that your target. Q) Children in dark makes accidents ? A) Actually its otherway around, Accidents in the dark make children. Q) Women should not have children after 35, what do you say ? A) yep, 35 children are enough. Q) How is your office ? A) Like hell with fluorescent lighting. Q) Explain me what is conscience ? A) Conscience is what hurts when all your other parts feel so good. Q) who are you ? A) I am a waste of two billion years of evolution. Q) My girl friend says, all her friends got tattos. A) Ask her to realize after 40 years we will have all old women running around with tatto

Action-Reaction 6

Here comes the new episode of Action-Reactions, this is dedicated to the people with girl friend. Its for fun, don't take it seriously, coz no body comes out of life alive........Happy reading !!! Q) Why do men like love at first site ? A) Because they know its all over, once she opens her mouth. Q) Why do men like smart women ? A) Because they are so rare. Q) What is the thinnest book in the world. A) Biography of a happy lover. Q) How do you feel when your girlfriend rejects you ? A) I feel under valued as per my current market value :-) Q) When we were together my girlfriend used to say, I die for you. A) Ask her to keep the promise now. Q) If you had will, you would have got your girl friend ? A) I had will, but she had another way. Q) I am looking for a good girl. A) Good girls are bad girls that never get caught. Q) Why you left your girlfriend and planning to marry someone else ? A) If I have to chose between two evils, I would prefer picking the one never tried before. Q) W

June is ending tomorrow !!!

Its so bad that June month, the month which I love most is ending tomorrow. Tomorrow is June 30th. I dont have power to grant one more day in June, I wish I could. I like June month, dont know why. Some how its special to me, so special. If my life is written as history June month will have the most of my feelings. I think I had everything which a man wishes in June. I was born in June. My first job started in June, first resignation, even second job also started in June and many more things like this :-). It looks like whatever I start in June, I will end in June. Having said that, with all respect to the month of June, I say bye bye to you June. Meet you again next year. But remember I miss you.

Counter - Encounter 5

Thank you for your nice complements on this series, that gives me the encouragement to continue this further....... You can't see good in any thing, are you pessimist ? No, Realist. Can you admit you have a problem ? No , I am not married yet. Its matter of prestige ? Take your prestige to the market and lets see how many eggs you get. My pain was your pleasure ? My pleasure paining you ? Are you a good guy ? There are only two good guys in the world, one who just born and the one who just died. Wish me happy birthday ? OK, you lost one more year of your life, now go and celebrate. Your astrology is not good. Go and ask God, I cant be responsible for his mistake. What are you doing ? Diving into my own destruction, want to Join ? What is most dangerous thing in life ? A smiling wife welcoming you at your door step, when you return home. Why you are continuously staring and smiling at her ? coz, When we meet next time she feels my face familiar :-)

Telugu Proverbs

Some excellent proverbs I liked in telugu.... Happy Reading !!! బతికి పట్నం చూడాలి...చచ్చి స్వర్గం చూడాలి బరితెగించిన కోడి బజార్లో గుడ్డెట్టినట్టు బొంకరా బొంకరా పోలిగా అంటే టంగుటూరి మిరియాలు తాడికాయంత అన్నాడట భోగం ఇల్లు తగలబడిపోతోందంటే గోచీలు విప్పుకుని పరుగెత్తారంట మంచోడు, మంచోడు అంటే, మంచమెక్కి ఏదో చేసాడంట మనిషి మర్మం, మాను చేవ బైటికి తెలియవు మందుకని పంపిస్తే మాసికం నాటికి వచ్చే రకం మాటకు మా ఇంటికి... కూటికి మీ ఇంటికి అన్నట్లు ముద్దొచ్చినప్పుడే, చంకనెక్కాలి మూరెడు పొంగటం ఎందుకు బారెడు కుంగటం ఎందుకు? రాజుని చూసిన కంటితో మొగుడిని చూస్తే, మొత్తబుద్ది అవుతుంది రావిచెట్టుకు ప్రదక్షిణాలు చేస్తే పిల్లలు పుడతారంటే చుట్టు చుట్టుకూ పొట్ట చూసుకుందట లంఖణం చెయ్యమంటేనే ఉపవాసానికి ఒప్పుకున్నట్టు వంగలేక మంగళవారం అన్నాడంట వినేవాడు వెధవ అయితె పంది కూడా పురాణం చెపుతుంది శుభం పలకరా పెళ్ళికొడకా అంటే పెళ్ళికొచ్చినోళ్లంతా నా పెద్దపెళ్లాలు అన్నాడట శాస్త్రం ప్రకారం చేస్తే కుక్క పిల్లలు పుట్టాయంట సత్రం భోజనం మఠం నిద్ర అన్నట్లు సూది కోసం సోది కెళితే పాత రంకంతా బయట పడిందిట పెళ్ళీకి పందిరి వెయ్యమంటే చావుకి పాడి

Counter - Encounter 4

Time for next episode of fun !!!! Q) what sign you born under ? A) No parking sign. Q) Are you good looking ? A) I am classically handsome :-) Q) Why you get so much angry ? A) Anger is misdirected passion Q) Why people are crazy about new technology ? A) New technology is like teenage girl, its attractive till it becomes old. Q) I am warning you not to do that ? A) I am programmer we dont care about warning, we bother about errors only. Q) What do you think of company latest statistics ? A) Lies are 3 kinds, lies , damn lies and statistics. Q) How to treat friends and enemies ? A) Keep friends close and enemies closer. Q) I lie frequently, my 1st brother is a chatterbox, 2nd brother always confuses others ? A) You can become Sales guy, your 1st brother has good manager material in him and your 2nd brother can succeed as HR. Q) How do you celebrate your birthday ? A) I don't have habit of celebrating mistakes. Q) Whats your age ? A) 18 (+ 10), 18 till I die. Q) My husband always th

Counter - Encounter -3

This girl is so cute Hope she stays cute , when grown up..... Are you romantic? Yep, as romantic as pope. Why you are looking so guilty ? Its my natural look. Why do you stare at woman ? That's god's way, that's why eyes are in front. You don't know how i am feeling like ? Feeling like paroled from marriage prison. ? I cook for health ? I cook to eat. Can I have that ? You can get it, if I don't want it. When are you planning to go to your house ? Until Red Cross says its safe to go. Money is not the only thing which gives happiness Yes, more money gives more happiness. Tell me two impossible things ? Passing boring time and getting back the lost time.

Our Iceberg is melting !!!

I just completed reading a wonderful book called 'Our Iceberg is Melting', Its really good book about 'change' written by John Kotter. After Kenneth Blanchard, this guy might be worth follwing. He has done so much scientific research on CHANGE. In this book he takes an example of Melting Iceberg and Penguins. The whole story is about how they managed change. A few penguin characters like 'NO NO', Alice, Fred represent the real time characters we have seen in our life. Here is the excerpt of the book for you at a glance: The 8 step process of successful change.... Set the stage 1. Create a Sense of Urgency. 2. Pull together the guiding team. Decide what to do 3. Develop the change vision and strategy : How can you make future a reality. Make it Happen 4. Communicate for understanding and Buy In. 5. Empower others to act 6. Produce short-term Wins 7. Don't let up (pause) Make it Stick 8. Create a new culture. Some nice one liners in the book are as follows Few

Save Trees

Its just not a slogan or thing of the past...its in action, where? in Hyderabad. We talk and keep listening about the real estate investment in hyderabad, we do know about the increase in population and pollution. But here is something the forest department is involved in along with R&B (Roads and Building) department. For road widening trees need to be cut, but then what about those trees? They become more or less a trash......Mr Ramdev, a local businessman, in love of nature thought of utilizing this big loss. Plants and seeds which take years to grow into a tree shouldn't be cut and wasted. They need to be reused. So he started with translocating and transplanting 200 such trees, which felled. Also for trees where trunks were damaged but branches are healthy where transplanted as well. It was a wonderful idea and trees got a new life with new leaves on it. Now for the next road stretch which is to be cleaned forest department along with R&B will credit the work to the hi